here we are again…yet different


aaa

There are too many rules
placed on things
too many rules that destroy the magic
too many expectations and desires and goals and rules
too many
and they drown out the fun
the magic
the light
the effervescence

This is how I used to feel many years ago before I finally decided to pick up my pen and write away. I have rarely seen the encouragement to write anywhere else beyond this poem of hers.

Acire Rae is one of my favorite writers. She writes rarely but writes so well. I always missed her writings and since I’m a sucker for beauty too, I missed seeing her beautiful beyond words picture that was already showcased on my own blog post a couple of years ago at;

https://aatayyab.wordpress.com/2018/05/17/acire-rae/

Here’s the complete poem of hers since I could not find the “reblog” button on her blog;

here we are again…yet different

Here we are again

this seems familiar

all those other times that I’ve suddenly felt like writing again

the “i’m back” posts

the “I’m not going to say I’m back, but I am”

the “I feel like writing”

the “I’ve had writer’s block”

the “I know I’ll come back eventually”

All those different posts.

And yet again, here I am.

Sitting before the computer screen,

typing away

unsure of what to say

but typing anyway

stream of conscious

the feeling of wanting to write,

but being scared

being embarrassed of

being that person who goes without warning

and pops back up again

But all I know is that the desire to write had dwindled

dwindled down until it was easy to push aside

forget about

well, almost forget about

I’ve been wanting to write

but what?

Does it matter?

Do I start fresh?

Start where I left off?

Make a post explaining?

Just leave it a mystery?

In the end,

I don’t think it matters

because I write for me

in the end, that’s what it is

I write for me first and you second

There are too many rules

placed on things

too many rules that destroy the magic

too many expectations and desires and goals and rules

too many

and they drown out the fun

the magic

the light

the effervescence

I get so caught up in the other side of things

the side if things that “prompts” the blog

gets my name out there

needing to like things, comments on things

explore the endless depths on the internet

until that part zaps away the joy

makes writing seems daunting, cumbersome and frustrating

setting rules of types of pieces to write, and when

of what type of content to gain attention

but I don’t want to do this for attention

If I did, I would have kept with it

in the end, if attention comes, I’d want it to be a byproduct

I’m just writing

and everything else happens organically

I feel the pull to jump back into that craziness

and I choose to let it go.

Writing is for me, an outlet

a place to dream

a world to explore

a way to process

and that’s all it needs to be

So, here we are again…yet different

Different, because there are no rules, no expectations expect one

that I write. That’s it.

Just

Write.


Courtesy:

here we are again…yet different

 

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s