A “fuck you, bitch” response without any tears by men will probably color them back to normal. The point Em is trying to make here is how can a woman avoid changing focus without being affected by her tears. No matter how much we try to understand the science of tears, emotions overpower any control over our reactions (verbal or otherwise). I think let the tears flow and keep being yourself. And things with more desirable outcome will become closer to what we are striving for. Remember, words coupled with tears are the most powerful thing out there.
I tend to leak tears when I’m angry, upset, or frustrated: it’s one of the most annoying things about being female. It even trumps the random black hairs that periodically show up on my chin. [i]
There you are, making a point about something you’re passionate about, presenting a rebuttal or holding your space when suddenly, your voice cracks. You sniff because your nose has started to run. You realize tears are imminent.
I try to fight them off by breathing deeply, pursing my lips, and swallowing repeatedly. Sometimes it even works. The tears are exceptionally frustrating because as soon as tears appear, men essentially stop listening. It’s even worse with doctors, and you’re already at a disadvantage there simply by being female. Lest you feel compelled to jump in with “but my doctor’s awesome,” I had an excellent doctor, too. But anecdotes are almost never evidence. [ii]
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